Getting back the fun

Today was another rainy day, and it rained for the whole run this time, rather than slacking off after the start. It wasn't that bad, except for the fact that I'd come out pretty much straight away after getting home, and hadn't bothered to wash off my makeup, with the result that the rain washed a nasty combination of rainwater, persperation and foundation into my eyes; I spent most of the run squinting and cursing, and vowing to buy a proper hat to run in. It was the 6.6 mile run, and I think we managed it in about 50-odd minutes.

The most important thing about today, though, was the thinking I did. Maybe I've been thinking too much. Running has been starting to lose it's appeal a bit, and I wasn't enjoying it as much. My knee hurts, but tomorrow's shopping should sort that out, I guess, and I'm fretting all the time about what time I'm running in, whether I'll manage the half-marathon in the time I want, and so on. And then it dawned on me that hey, while I think the idea of doing the odd race is good, ultimately I run because I like it, and yeah, because I don't want to go back to being overweight. Not because I want to be (or am capable of being!) a professional athelete or anything. I'm not slow enough to be classed as a complete plodder, but I'm a hobby runner, and I'll do the best I can, and thats enough.

And once I remembered all of that - that it doesn't matter if I do Grunty Fen in 1hr 50 or 3hrs 50 , that what matters is I do it, and ditto with all the other races and stuff, I felt much much better and happier.

So I'm going to try and stop stressing about time. I'm going to go back to running because I enjoy it, and if I come in last, well, I've still done my best. As long as I feel I've done that, I think I'll be happy.